Tag Archives: work

Day 810 – in bloom



Recognizing myself as life through… change and persistent work.

I have lived a rather turbulent life, after my teens I was stuck in much addictions, mental illness, in the extreme of options, and often sabotaging myself and life for everyone else.

Since January 2012, when really starting to walk my desteni i process, of forgiving myself and starting to literally save myself. To heal and recover. It has now been more than 5 years  of steady walking. And it is at the moment my job, now, to recognize in me, with me, the change that have taken place. To literally learn to know the new me.


You can say that now I have learned to live, learning to know my living organism, my body, the physical within self. Finding a reason to be able to (be) response – able. To learn to be self honest. This I have more or less incorporated into my living. Into making my life into support and to thrive as a living organism, as a being. This have taken me lots of work and dedication. Point now is to trust myself. To accept myself as all that I have been and all that makes me. To recognize what and how I already have managed to change as and with myself.


Today I live on my second year in a camphill village in south west norway. I have healthy food, clean water, roof over my head. Good friends, some real work, a network internationally of people who are dedicated to working within the same as me : to become whole and complete, physical, self honest, real, best for all, versions of the very self.

Life is now blooming for me…. in many of the words meaning. Life is complex and life is dear. It is the only on we get !

I greet you in oneness and equality – as life !


Investigate : http://desteni.org/




Day 769 – Camphill living

Perspective on living in a ecological farm


cows out to grass

Camphill villages is ecologically driven villages and farms and communities that is suited and designed to people with disabilities and needs, who don’t usually fit into the larger hectic/capitalistic society/system. Personally I am diagnosed with schizophrenia.

My camphill life is structured so I can work my way through my schizophrenia with walking with the tools of desteni.org

I just realized that from me living on a ecological, camphill farm and village it gives me the opportunity to have structure. HUH ! We all need some sort of structure and organizing to function optionally. To me structure is like a pattern of organizing – it gives me a sense of control in my living. And after that freedom within the application/task !

I live in a camphil village in the south west of Norway. I have lived here since 01.07.2016. Let me tell you that life here is truly swell. Now there are so many different ways to be living life here on this earth and I would say I am truly grateful for living where I am and under these conditions that is present.

It gives me routines and structure. I provides me with cultural and spiritual/emotional insight. It serves me the best and healthiest of food. It grounds me with good work for the body. It gives me inspiring and touching and dear talks and interactions. It provides me with very dear friendship and colleges and hugs, and it is a international touch to it with people here from all corners of the world.

Life here is season based. And there are things like Bible study groups and practice of Christian tradition. This is of course voluntary if ones chooses to participate or not. I find the Bible study group very interesting – I get to share my insights and perspective from this important historical script.


me after a days work

Now in the spring I can walk outside and pick my food of herbs from the garden. I can go swim in the fjord or in a freshwater stream, and enjoy a talk, a flower, a goat  … on my way to do so.

There are currently goats, sheep, cows, chicken, birds, bees, and cats here. They provide me with honesty, insight , groundednes, stability,  and realness, awareness and strength – besides the meat, milk, honey and eggs that is also on my plate.

We are very sufficient with dairy products, meat, some herbs, some fruits, berries and also a lot of vegetables.  This awareness is awesome and it brings up gratefulness and humbleness within me.

Camphill living with interacting with animals is very therapeutic. A goat will “tell” you straight. The animals, are honest and real, they are not mind based like us humans.   They don’t have our obsessive thinking, so they are more stabile and here, firm, grounded, sound as physical and natural. Something I know that we humans must learn sooner or later…

Being able to go out and pet a cow or a sheep or talk to the chickens is just medicine ! Very rejuvenating and real! I am very grateful for that presence in my living. It makes me more honest, and alive, like colourful and expressive.


One can even go as far as to say that this planet should be for animals and nature only, and not for humans. If we look at how humans treat nature, other humans, animals and so on… it makes sense. Which means that we (humans) must change… or we are doomed. There is no other way.


I am grateful for my living in this camphill. Some of the traditions is maybe not of my liking, but there is room to discuss and debate most things. The antroposofic way is known to be a alternative way of living in Norway. Most of it is very cool and down to earth. Either way we can debate practice and reach common ground. The environment  and the ecological policy is very appealing to me and I would imagine to all people. The camphill way is by all means a way for the future.  I don’t agree to some of the Christian/religious traditions, but we can work through it and come to agreements.

The way of living is simple, and structured and rich. I recommend to find a camphill near you, and become friends with them, visit them and test it out. There are camphill villages mostly in Western Europe, North America, but also in Russia, South – Africa and India.

Enjoy your investigation of camphill !



Day 709 : Day 16 : Fear of work



Day 16 of 21 days of walking with self forgiveness

I will take on the challenge from my brother : Gian Robberts on walking a 21 day trial of (only/daily) self forgiveness on points. I will walk these points of self forgiveness for self/world change during 21 days.


Here is Gain’s Blog :


21 days of self forgiveness on key points.

The points will be that kind of relevant points as of this world and our living.

Money, sex, politics, work, religion, mind  and so on.


Day 16:  Fear of work


Please read loud for best effect


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to participate in work and to fear to miss out on a news or a event taking place online, that I should have been the first to see/read, and to fear to miss out on life, from working instead of surfing the web.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to work from fear of not getting enough pay or reward from my work failing to see that my work makes the everyday of other people easier and more comfortable and so my participating helps others in their daily life, and that is my reward.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see how work makes me appreciate life more and to value private time more and to heal more when I don’t work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel glad or proud that my work makes it ok and comfortable for me to say self forgiveness while I work.

I have a more and more clearer overview of what is my capacity and my limits within working, and that this awareness feels calming.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to like more and more to work and how I miss to work when I have been out of work some time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I see most my time
(not sleeping) as work, it is work to do dishes and to hang up clothes, and to write this, and so  should also be valued within a system or economics in a new and different system, as work to be rewarded.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into energies of thinking work is not for me and I should not work simply eat and sleep since I have schizophrenia, within this failing to realize that work can be adjusted to me and to my tempo and ability and that my working can (and must) be adjusted to me and my capacity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to work with other people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think  my contribution is more or more special since I have schizophrenia, and within this secretly judge and moralize over the thousands of people sitting in front of a screen all day not working and carrying such a diagnosis, and thinking that those people with nothing to do, does bad things to their self value and to their general being and so to the world in total.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to value and give positive judgments/energies to the ordinary worker, failing to see that this worker  is myself, and I should  be cheering for myself instead.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see working conditions to workers across the world worsen by the minute and how we are driven into desperation and into separation our of our own design and creation – and it have to end and it ends with me!

I will live the change. I commit myself to do a good job, I commit myself to share my insights open and honest to a working leader and to a superior/boss, and to share my needs and abilities open and so I can be understood, and so work can be made comfortable – also by a schizophrenic.

I commit myself to make sure working conditions are made better for all people, and to work steady and consistent towards a goal or oneness and equality for all life.



More on the word: work

& here is a video about redefining the word : work



Day 680 – coop in psychiatry


cooperative in mental health





Mental health services in the western world, is mostly run by government and public spending. Some few are private. What triggers this idea of mine/mind to have a cooperative of mental health is the more and more psychiatry – survivors that are out there that have lots of valuable experience with psychiatry and drugs, psychology, emotions, recovery, self investigation, metaphysics, addictions, hospital and…. life.


People who have been in psychiatry for many years. Girls and boys who know what psychiatry and mental suffering/psychosis is all about. People who know them self, that have capacity, capacity to help others after recovering; self first. People who know what has a effect. People who know what and how to heal.


People with experience. I would like to start a cooperative and a unit of people within a coop and a unit, a company that is owned by the workers/survivors.  A service based on communication, learning writing, self communication, self forgiveness and all good (!!) and non abusive therapy methods like music, painting, swimming, climbing, knitting and all sorts of expressions.

This coop would offer the best treatment that us imaginable to its users. I am talking about all the progressive and over all good (!!) and supportive treatments, like open dialogue by dr: Seikkula, The Extented Therapy Room Foundation‘s methode and  approach from, Soteria – house thinking,  nutrition, exercise, arts, theatre, and all sorts of supportive  treatments of self therapy and self healing. Hearing voices circles and the 12 step program from the addiction anonymous movement. I am talking writing therapy, and team work. We humans can be our own worst judge and bullies –  we can then be our own best helper and friend.

I would like to start this coop and training and working ground. It may at a early stage be international and crossing borders. It may very well include both survivors and peers, scholars, addicted and others. To change psychiatry into something that supports life and creativity instead of drugging it down. To leave the old behind and go full for a new and supportive and healing psychiatry that suits the one.

Based on the very fundaments of nature; oneness and equality, and of what is best for all. If you would like to contribute to this creation of a new care and therapy system, I suggest you drop me a line: my email is: tormodhg@gmail.com


Let me hear from you





Day 633 – Fear of starting my own business


fear is a illusion


self forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to start my own company where I give into thinking I would do something wrong with the papers or I would somehow fail and loose my money with my company and I would somehow fail to run my company and end up like a clown. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the paranoia of feeling alone and left out in the cold to do my business, thinking I would have to grow greedy, corrupt and cheat on taxes to manage my company and have a income.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to do something illegal with my company and to end up like a criminal, without or with knowing it, and then face jail or punishment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself my idea of entrepreneurs as greedy and corrupt that I am programmed with from being very young, throughout my entire life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that now I do exactly like I would fear from being very young, and that I am somehow going against myself and my own programming.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am not yet experienced enough and I should learn some more about finances or data programming or healthcare, where I give into this fear that I will not be successful and always drag with me this fear and this idea of myself as handicapped and schizophrenic and not able to run a business by myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think on the opposite side of this polarity that I am special and schizophrenic and I should there for be able to run a company and there for be more successful and creative with my company.


self correction

When and as I see myself fearing to run my own company. I stop myself. I slow myself down and I breathe. I realize that I am taking measures to be better prepared to run a company of my own, and I realize that I will walk the miles to do what must be done with a company. I realize that I have to be structured and organize to run a company. I realize I may have to imply some new routines.

I commit myself to listen to advise from other that are skilled with running a business, and I commit myself to imply their ideas to my life.

I commit myself to listen more and to do a thoroughly job with my  company within the field of psychology/psychiatry.

Day 605 – The immigration problem – what is the solution ?

As long as there is poverty issues, and war issues somewhere in this world, then people will flee and become refugees within this world. During 2014, 42,500 persons per day, left their homes. Today there are about 60 million refugees in this world. Fleeing from poverty and crimes, running from atrocities of their home land. Why ? Because the system is rigged this old way to really on war and to really on poverty. Capitalism is today reliant on someone being poor and someone being without money. Western government send billions and billions in aid to these countries and then corrupts the country and leave it form cooperation and lawyers and military to keep them in their misery. Through perpetual wars around the world. There are people whose job is to create conflict in this world. To keep Africa in a constant fight, and to create the state of Israel to have eternal war in the middle east. For profit. For money.


I would have done the same. If I was born in Somalia, and being told that no there is no job for you. You cannot have money – no sufficient food – nope, no safety of a house. Sorry.

If I was told this then of course I would flee to UK or to France or to Sweden or Denmark, because I know that life there is better.

Anyone would flee and be a refugee. No doubt about it. So it is all about placing oneself in the shoes of the immigrant. Of the refugee. And think what is the best solution to this issue?

These refugees, try to find better life. They do it to survive. They do it because there is no other option. And we in the western world have robbed their resources (gold, oil, gas, diamantes, and so on) and bombed their country and they children. These countries are very rich on resources. It is just that they are being exploited, by big capitalism and the old system. We all did this. For profit, for money.

We need to change this old system of aid and exploiting, and war form profit. We need a new system. And that system is a Living Income Guaranteed/Basic Income for all. Stop all private banks. Private banking is the very, very driving factor in this world towards war and conflict. Private banks that are owned by a very few elitist families are one of the very most ruining factors in this life. End private banks. That would be a start. Give everyone money to live a life in decency. Give money direct to all.


Check out the link : Have a nice day

Day 592 – Living words: Reinforcement


Current allocation:

I see reinforcement like what it is of metal construct that supports the concrete inn being strong and solid, as a construction. I see reinforcement as the very important part of construct of the concrete that we build and that we place into our infrastructure. I also see this word as totally new to myself. I just discovered it and that is interesting. Until now I have only known the Norwegian word from this sort of building material. I have only know this Norwegian word “armoring”. The phenomena of reinforcement in concrete is something that I have worked with before, since I have been working making concrete constructions and concrete elements of building blocks to build houses and concrete buildings. I used to be a construction worker some while back. I was working in a fabric making concrete construct and building blocks to build houses and big office buildings. I was working with reinforcement. I would think that reinforcement is so important that it is like the very essence of a building. At the same time it is sort of word of support. You give thumbs up and you are being supportive to another and reinforcing the other person, to sort of cheer up or bring up the spirit up again. One can support oneself with reinforcement. One could literally bring back power to oneself through reinforcement, by bring in back what was separated in the first place. And also a third way I look at this word, is through eyes military reinforcement. To strengthen the military presence of being somewhere. But most in essence and importance I would see it as a personal edification/embracing and strengthening of self and living.

Dictionary definition:

The act or process of reinforcing or the state of being reinforced.

Something that reinforces.


  1. 1600, “act of reinforcing,” from reinforce + -ment. Meaning “an augmentation, that which reinforces” is from 1650s. Related: Reinforcements.

Sounding of word:

rain for sent

rain for a cent

rain to force

rain to forest



Negative polarity: If it is about military, then I am disappointed and sad because to my mind we do not need any military they are simply not needed at all. I would also be sad of seeing the ruined bombed homes of Palestine and other was zones, where one can see the reinforcement bars peeking out ruined.

Positive polarity: To reinforcement the society and social structure is what is going on . We need to reinforce the whole society and the whole world through more equal sharing of money and resources. We also need to reinforce how we treat other life from and nature. The abuse have to end.

Creative writing: We should need to de – force the military and to reinforces the social structure and the social needs and basic needs of all human and also the rest of all life on this planet. We should reinforce the whole stand and change those parts of capitalism that is not best for all, into something that is best for all. Military would have to be decrease into nothing.

Self forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project out the word “reinforcement” like I am reinforcing when I project it, I am simply seeing the issue in another and not playing a active part in the actual reinforcing at all, I am simply projecting this word and removing myself form the responsibility out of not living this word in general.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I see that we need to reinforce economy with a basic income to all people, as means to strengthen society and economy and to heal and bring ease to economy/the individual by giving more equal to everyone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project out a example of concrete and construction reinforcement as a sort example of being a construction worker and sort of symbolism that I am acting in solidarity with other people and creating a symbol of solidarity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to see how I could reinforce myself as I would not be clear or ready or in any other typical way where aware of how I was ready to reinforce of inn other ways ready or prepared to reinforce myself back to myself in any ways.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fail to see how I could ever reinforce myself in any ways and I would fear or dislike how I could reinforce myself because I have limited experience with that word.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project out at my reality and world/others that I would like to have reinforcement, and sort of projecting it out and thinking that I would be reinforces from that perspective.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I can reinforce myself by projecting reinforcement out at the world /others, simply acting like I was calling out like baby to be feed or to have my treat.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cry out to the world that I would like reinforcement like a victim calling out for help and assistance, wanting to pity myself with chocolate and candy because I could not figure out what was reinforcement.

When and as I see myself projecting out reinforcement and I see that I feel almost like pitting myself, and I would start to think I need to reinforce myself and I simply do not take the needed steps to do so efficiently. I stop myself, I slow myself down, and I breathe. I realize that I will use this new experience of a word to edification myself, and bring back to myself all that was separated from me and quit projecting out as projecting is not honest or cool at all. I realize that I should simply need to reinforce myself with chores and both physical work and cognitive challenges. I realize that I would need to further investigate how I could reinforce myself and further investigate how I could reinforce myself back to myself complete and one with all and everything.

I commit myself to reinforcement.

I commit myself to investigate reinforce within and without of myself and my living so that I can stand equal and one within my life and my living.

I commit myself to bring reinforcement to myself like It was first separated and now I bring it back and make myself one and equal with life and my being.

I commit myself to reinforce myself and to make myself complete.

When and as I see myself thinking of reinforcement. I stop myself, I slow myself down and I breathe. I realize that I very soon relate to my old working with construction some 15 years ago. I realize that I have memories of working with bars of reinforcement in constructions. I realize that I would like to reinforce myself as my physical to strengthen myself and my own body through working-out and exercising. To honor my life and being. I realize that I need to bring back to myself all that was separated. I realize that to bring back and forgive and embrace is reinforcing of myself together with working out.

I commit myself to embrace and forgive and to then reinforce myself .


Reinforcing: Is strengthening of mass or a unit to increase its supportive ability and further quality.