Tag Archives: heaven

Day 808 – thanks to desteni…..



I was just listening to a interview of anuaki in the reptilian series, on eqafe, and I wanted to share this post on that concern. Walking my life process, I learn a great deal from others who are walking the same as me, or something similar.

I would like to take this opportunity and audacity of writing a blog in gratitude. I am so lucky to live and breathe in Norway, so I can write pretty much anything and post it from free (!) online, for millions to be able to read…. THAT in itself is a pretty fucking fantastic thing, and I am grateful for so !

I would like on this day to bring out some thanks. The first thanks goes out to my parents. My parents have through thick and thin stood by me, for almost 40 years.  They have supported me, so many ways and lengths so that there is hardly no way to measuring it.

I owe you everything, though I don’t hold that as a energy,  but I am forever grateful – thank you two, for the life that I have been given.

My boldness and my openness, sharing, consistent, persistent nature, my consideration and honesty I have discovered within myself, self discovery – after starting to walk with desteni.org and learning from the people within that group – literally to realize me! I have been able to free myself from several addictions. I rose up to realize myself beyond polarity, personality, believes, emotions and consciousness. I was to discover me and my life potential. I am grateful for what life gives me to live, today I embrace each morning and bring thanks every night  !

The one and true solution to bring me to realize self and my being is without any comparing the online group we know as desteni.org

So I want to honor some destonians here. In fact all !

dem 4.jpg

From our gathering in Brussel, spring 2017


Thanks you all destonians who I have walked with the last decade – your existing is intriguing and deeply appreciated. I have learned a lot from walking with you all. In particular I would like to mention a few bloggers and walkers who I have particular learned very much from walking with, and that is first of all Kristina Salas. And the blog equality walk ! You are a  awesome example of consistency. That blog and those selection of words have taught me A LOT. Your example is very much appreciated Kristina ! Thanks for all the investigation and realizations, support and sharing of your life ! I have learned lots from your words and your living over the years. I think it is about to realize self, to become better from self. So totally awesome equality walk – humble thanks.

Also I would like to thank Anna Brix Thomsen who I have been walking with now for many years – and that I have shared my online life with, from the desteni I process and from managing self in this world. Your support is awesome and I learn from you all the time: to manage self and to find life hacks – great thanks !


Also I would like to mention the persistent and convincing Marlen Vargas Del Razo – for  the support that you have given me unconditionally for many (!) years. The short by efficient comments to my many youtube videos and your comments and questioning and appreciation of my blogs is simply breathtaking and I owe you first a good hug and to let you know how deep I appreciate and value the support that you still give. It may not be that visible what you do but in the long haul we see the marvel of marvels, birthing of life,  and the message of quality comes through.

You have taught me persistence and perseverance. And that realizing of reward to “keep at it”, to give up the giving up basically. Your presence is deeply appreciated.


I would like to mention Kim Klein for the example of walking through with OCD, I have still to manage my mentality and the awareness and example of you makes my days more structured and doable.

Also I want to thank the very awesome man of Matti Freeman – your example is magnificent ! Big inspiration.

Andrea Rossouw. You assisted me and saw my potential early on I guess. Walking with me through my demons and pain. Your dedication is very much appreciated and your humor and insight is also something I precious dearly.

Lets keep walking & supporting !


There are sooo many people I would like to hug and thank… People at our farm in South Africa – great support – thanks all: 100 % ! ….and everyone I work with everyday, From New Zeland to Europe, to China and All over this world. Humble thanks ! The message of equality and oneness is coming through in our living practicality – and that is what matters !


I can’t do this post without mentioning you Sunette. You teach me to be honest, simple, daring  and physical. You all are great examples and exceptional being. I have learned lots from you all and the many events, and communications and project we commonly share. May there be many, many more for the generations to come!  I got to meet and say “Hi” to Sunette in Brussels 2017. I got a short glimpse to who you are, and I find it very interesting that you want to show yourself, not only as the portal but also as you the girl from the farm – that you are. So I double appreciate you then Sunette lol. The LF chat is super cool to be a part of – you have thought me so much… man. Heavens Journey to life…   is sooo cool. All the things you have showed me I appreciate perhaps most : the small things that we take for granted (?) stability, presence, internet, breathe, clean water, warm shower, my body, grass, animals… you are very dear to me and I want to honor you as best I can ! So thank you Sunette for your awesome example !



Offcorse I have also learned lots of key ingredients and honest perspective from the one and only Bernard Poolman. A truly unique being, whom I still visit on youtube and the blog creations journey to life, to remind myself:  what is life about.


From desteni the group, all of you, buddies and newbie’s, bloggers, forgivers, mothers and children, I have been given the ingredients to learn self trust, self responsibility, self honesty. Integrity. Humbleness. So many deep qualities and wonders it completes my every day.

Check out the 7 year journey to life page on FB


So thank YOU for reading this and let’s keep walking and sharing and exposing our process and learn from each other.


I just realizes that I am greater than my schizophrenia – from the words (!) that I live…

equality and oneness – until it is done




The ultimate store online: https://eqafe.com/

Try out our free online course to learn self forgiveness : http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/




Day 566 – Child in time

I am giving it s a shot to simply write out from a empty mind. I realize that much of the key in my process, as of now, here, is to live like a child. Matthews 18 from the Bible. To enter heaven you must become a (the) child.

I realize this and I see myself living breathing playing eating , exploring, as this child. Myself. I see myself living and expressing as a young child. I see it a solution to be this child and to live the life for myself and to forgive the friction that I experience looking back when I was back then, being 2 or 5 or 10 years old, etc, and to embrace those moments and to forgive those parts of my past.

I realize that this is one of the great keys in my life as how I live it now. I realize that to birth life from physical is the solution to create life from nothingness, to forgive self.

I realize myself as a child, I see how I manage to create a better life for myself. To let go of the past and to move on in my life. The things that might be creating spite and anger/friction within me I have to forgive, but the memory will not disappear. I will have to move on from the memory. I will have to move on with myself. Let it go and move past it.

Here is what living as a child is so smart because children does not judge self. At least not if it is a toddler. A child that learns to walk does not judge self for falling down – it simply gets up again and continues to walk until success.

What is Self-forgiveness?
It is the process by which an individual forgives oneself for accepting and allowing self to separate from objective reality, releasing positive and negative value judgments such as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative – as subjective interpretations of reality regarding something or someone that leads to stability as breath.

– June Roca


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I am thought well, of what is the esthetics or moral in life to live by the golden rule, that I would think to myself I learned from my parents and that I would consider myself lucky as of how I was raised where I would feel gratitude to my parents because they have thought me well and they have thought me some quality manners throughout my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to see how self forgiveness of moments in my childhood really turns the coin for me and helps me to stabilize myself within my process and within my being and living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself internal conversations where I judge myself for being a young child playing with palymo and I would judge myself because I had lots of playmo, and lots of toys, but typically boys/girls in Calcutta or in Africa or else, did not have this opportunity to play with so many toys as I could, and this would create this ditch of guilt and judgment within myself when I look back at being this young boy, playing with the dynamics.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look back into my world as I was being a young boy toddler and I would think to myself how innocent and adorable I looked being this little toddler boy and how I look all new and inexperienced within my life and my world breathing being here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I would think of being a baby and learning my parents to “know “my parents as they where the most important people in my life and how I took on this meeting and learning equally with them in daily life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I was aware then, being a toddler that my parents where the most important people, in my life, that whatever they would be teaching me whatever they knew or wanted me to know would make huge impact as so it did.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I see I was acting in awareness to remind my parents of how their words and teachings would matter greatly to me, and I would try to tell my parents that their teaching of me would matter immensely to me, and that I would have to calculate out and work out any wrong doing/teaching and that any wrong doing would have a huge impact on life/me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself how I discover that I as a child, and most likely any other child, likes a good view, a larger overview of nature and waters and mountains etc, and that it is healthy to have a over view as of the situation of oneness life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think of my years as being a baby as I was innocent and sacred and sort of new in the world.

When and as I see myself starting to judge myself and I would start to blame myself for doing things wrong or not right. I stop and I breathe. I realize that like a child I will not judge myself it is all pre – programmed, and I cannot judge myself or any wrong doing I can become responsible with myself but it would be wrong to judge myself. I realize that I must be able to fall/fail and get up again and go at it over again. I commit myself to not judge myself but instead live like the child and to stand up like the child/myself, and learn to stand up. I commit myself to stand up and to learn to walk over and over again until I can stand and walk on myself. I commit myself to stand within and ass my physical body and picture. I commit myself to stand in equality and oneness, with everything and all of existence. I commit myself to live as this child and to be this child in time and without time and to express and live to the fullest I can be as myself in every moment and to give as I would like to receive and to love my neighbor.


Develop self perfection:


Desteni Stands for Oneness & Equality


Free online writing course:




Desteni I process


Day 521 – Equal and one with shame.

I have for a long time carried a certain degree of shame within me. The shame that is present within me is rooted in my childhood and within the experience of being thought that, there is a specific difference between right and wrong, good and bad, and most specifically, heaven and hell. This false awareness would stain my conscious through almost all my life. A child is taught that there is a difference between heaven and hell, good and bad, and the difference between good and bad, black and white. And still children of this earth is not thought, the specific difference, between a emotion and a feeling. They are the same as energies but difference in the actual living life. And further how we are enslaved to thoughts, feelings and emotions, round and round into infinity. We are thought that there is good and bad, positive and negative but we are still not taught to express our emotions specifically. We are taught this trough TV and mass media, school and society to think positive. Focus on the plus pole, while wee are also then, feeding the negative polarity within unconscious. Which is a creating war, within so without.

So that explained. I have a certain degree of shame within me. I am shameful and I would like to move beyond this shame. Enough is enough. I realize that I let this shame direct me into having more and more shame and ending up with judging myself within this shame, and experiencing that this shame is making my life hell because I was not thought in school or elsewhere to be prepared for this. If you want to be kind to your child, teach the child words. All sorts of words. Tell them words where they can learn to express, and evolve from the ordinary enslavement off thoughts, feelings and emotions from Disney & My little Kitty etc.

I was, as millions before me and millions after me have been taught that there is good and bad, right and wrong, mostly as of the outside world. How to blame. That the energies that we have within our bodies are simply feelings, all of them, and that one is not allowed to show emotions and that only feelings are allowed. I realize that I have grown quite extensive with joining desteni team. Desteni I process pro. l had to learn that, there is heaven and there is hell, but there is also in between, there is also here now me physical. That we can create into heaven. But I have had a hard time to understand there is emotions, also. I had been completely brainwashed by school, and society. But now I have learned that there is more than just feelings to a feeling. There is also emotions, this can be hard to understand to very many people. As it was to me.

I realize that through living the Jesus message I can change myself. Love thy neighbor as thy self. I realize that through teaching others and the coming generation about emotions and energies within the physical and also within life in general about how energies are in relations to humans and to our minds. I commit myself to teach from my knowledge and awareness that there are distinct differences between feelings and emotions.

So I have these marks on my past within my mind conscious system a degree of shame from my past. How do I move from that ? How can I lay behind me and move on within my life from this shame after forgiven it ? I need to make a clear statement of commitment to myself to nail it to physical sort of.

I commit myself to learn other people what I have learned of what emotions are. I commit myself to teach children and others that there is more than just feelings to a expression and that there is more to mind than conscious.

I commit myself to break down taboos within my world where I see that they are causing corruption and fear. And I commit myself to learn methods of teaching away my knowledge and information and to let other people learn from me and to become that cool old teacher that I dreamt of as a child.

I commit myself to be solution oriented and to provide myself with commonsense perspectives and to do what is best for all always. I commit myself to think like a child and to use my brain and my body to evolve and bring solutions to life from all the problems that I face. I commit myself to let shame be where shame is and to move myself in awareness from shame and stop myself when I go into self judging from such a reason. I commit myself to teach children new words and to help them evolve as who they are within their lives. I commit myself to leave behind shame and to leave behind shame that is making life hell for me. I commit myself to leave shame behind as to rather think like a child within my living and life possibilities. I commit myself to take my possibilities with me further inn life and to engage in work for instance. I commit myself to live my life and to realize myself and to realize my fullest potential.   I commit myself to stand in absolute equality and oneness to everything that I may face. I commit myself to within my life to do what is best for all.


Investigate: http://desteni.org/
Check out a free writing course: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/
Lets delete poverty: http://livingincome.me/
Self perfection: https://eqafe.com/