How I found desteni
I have been skeptic to this world and its system(s) since I can remember. This would very easy lead me into drugs and sabotage of society as it was presented before me, when I grew up. I would deeply oppose systems, what I saw of authorities, structures and organization of things in my surroundings, that would lead me to a very unstructured and unorganized, life and living. I was basically living in chaos, disturbance within and without, from very early on. I am today aware that I was born schizophrenic, so my life was sort of destined to be a “bumpy” road.
In 2008 or 2009, I was doing drugs, both doctors prescribed and hashish/weed, together with lots and lots of alcohol. I was a somewhat a busy artist, painter, with lots of girl friends. I was multiple addicted and very restless. My anxious and troubled nature was becoming a serious problem. Lucky for me I was born in Norway, and was under the wings of the health care system.
I was at this very evening, visiting a friend, we were drinking and “partying”. The party’s entertainment, came from the more and more popular youtube (YT), that would play in the many homes during drinking and partying to it’s different music and tunes. Lots of beer and sigaret’s and lots of YT.
Then my friend, whom I was visiting, asked me: “Would you like to see a portal ?” I can’t remember my reply, but anyhow he found a video, on YT, with the portal, doing a portaling/giving a message. I remember my jaw sort of fell to the floor. I was … quite shocked. This was now real. I remember feeling like, PJUH finally a solution to humanity’s misery and problems. After this very brief introduction, I was still possessed with energies/mind and addictions/enslavement and substance as such. But a certain spark within me was moving, I was aware, and I thought to myself there is no going back after this. I would in my schizophrenic mind see/experience the math or the metaphysical reality/imagination that was shifting, within so without. I could see or experience, thoughts like, there is no turning back now, this is it; I best get with it, and join in.
This will change the whole thing (world system).
That was my conclusion after seeing the videos of the portal on YT. I did not know what it would ask or … demand of me to do or investigate for my own sake. In 2010 I was still very, very lost in energy addictions. But at this time I started to write in demonology forum. I would write in that forum and I would have guiding from there to find my path or to learn myself to work on self forgiveness.
I was at this point 2008 – 2012 obsessed with schizophrenia. I worshipped it (in my own sabotaging way) with drugs, escapism and the extreme of culture. Addicting to conspiracy. It was the winter between 2011 – 2012 I had just driven myself to rock bottom traveling around in Europe. I was totally fucked, and long lost. And I came home to my parents, just like the prodigal son. I stayed with my parents, for about 2 years. During this time, I ended (may 2012) most of my substance/energy addictions. I also began to learn to make my own self forgiveness, to speak it to myself , moving myself from demonology forum, to (the common) desteni forum.
I was here given guidance and support with the things in my mind/my past. How to work through it. And I was from this point (may 2012) more and more committed to walk my process, in this life, here on earth. I connected with other destonians and started to study the message that was presented. To make it a world of equality and oneness – for what is best for all.
To be continued….