All posts by Tormod Hvidsten Gjedrem

Give time to: http://desteni.org/

Day 788 – Perspective and looking vs. reacting and interpreting

Perspective and looking vs. reacting and interpreting

 

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Interview here:

https://eqafe.com/p/perspective-vs-interpretation-reptilians-part-565

 

This interview was a eye opener for me. I just listened to it 3rd time,  and I was like wow… awesome is this real? I was told in the interview to look at the words and perspective and interpreting. And here is a view on it. Within perspective it is the peer, someone close, It could be one self,  that has a peek –  a speak, at something. A good hearted person looks at something. Perspective. Simply to look, and to genuinely care for what is best for all within a situation.

While interpreting is more like printing up old reactions into new again. Making judgments of old causes, being angry – again. Reposting the abuse. Printing the reactions – again.

 

What I notice and see when living the word perspective is quite unique. I see into the very come of the being, I see into the core of the other being when I  look at them. It is a whole new ball game lol… it is like walking around with these super cool glasses, like a childhood fantasy I use to have, of being able to change situations, by myself.

 

So don’t hesitate dive in to this very awesome interview from the one and only: eqafe.com

You can also go to eqafe and use the search bar for  what every issue you might have or wonder about.

Enjoy !

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

 

Day 787 – Vivacious – for what is best for all

Vivacious – for what is best for all

 

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I was made aware of this word, vivacious, starting within a numbness in my left thigh. Actually my thigh felt totally dead and “rotten”. And I contacted and asked for support from the Quantum Change Kinesiology, (QCK) team, and I was shortly after give details of matter – to what was metaphysically taking place in my thigh – and beyond – of my mind. Human memory is most often stored in the general body.

This word, vivacious, or crispness, lively, spirited, I have been living within a personality as a coping mechanism,  to suppress a negative point within.  I have been using this personality also without direction, noncommittal. This have been a balancing point within me to suppress a emotional point of sub-conscious character. So I have been living this vivacious and crispness/lively/spirited manner, to suppress a negative point within.

So I would like to dissolve the negative point through self forgiveness, and exposure,  and also to pick apart the positive vivacious, personality – and rather live that word vivacious for real, without the personality, suppression, and with a proper direction and commitment. To extract this word and “neutralize” it, delete the polarity and components,  from myself, and then use vivacious, as a redefined word to my everyday living.

 

So what I want to do is to take the ball in my own hands and score a 3 pointer, and end the game totally lol. So I have already forgiven and I am working on the negative point that I would like to suppress. The details from the QCK session are many and deep. Point is for me to see through this vivacious character because it is based on believes. I give myself permission to live this character of vivaciousness, from  some specific believes that I have been carrying with me. Positive believe structures of mind.   Like: I believe I can chose to be happy without any reason, or  I believe my inner child, or I believe I am loved etc. I have this personality of vivacious (crispness, lively, spirited) arranged from believes. So understand: I have been living this vivacious character to hide and suppress a negative point within myself. I need to deconstruct the polarized character, work on my suppression point,  and live the word: vivacious in itself as it is.

So what does it mean for me to be vivacious without the personality/polarity ? It means to be a bit silly, clownish and lively. And it would mean to take direction to a common good, to dare to break the ingrained pattern, to see best for all solutions taking place in the moment. To express. To be that catalyst of change to bring solution to the matter. Like if I standing with my dishes together with the people who I share house with, and the situation is a bit low or out of touch,  I can suddenly start to sing or make a joke, to actively share some of my solutions being vivacious, and silly/lively/creative. So that is what I can do In such a moment. To dare to be a bit silly.

 

We all could need to be more silly in a creative, and supportive way, we all enjoy being silly ! In times like today we could all enjoy to be more silly or like a clown. So this is my point that I would like to evoke within me, to express and live this word: vivacious – for what is best for all in any situation.

Rebeccas son

art by William Karlen

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up believes and ideas within to access a positive, vivacious personality, making it difficult/impossible to access this word without taking on the believes and the personality in itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think it is difficult or impossible to live this word, vivacious, without adding some believes to it, like making it a recipe of programming that I have to follow – a programming without direction, commitment or standing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in such moments of creativity and daring to be silly/clown, I would let the small things, the doubt or nervousness win me over – and limit me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up this personality to cover over and hide/suppress a emotional/negative point within and to use this vivacious/crispy personality to cover for my negative point within my sub-conscious.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a personality based on believes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself the need to suppress anything emotional within.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to look into my subconscious.

 

 

When and as I see myself wanting to live this word vivacious, I stop myself I slow myself down and I breathe. I realize that I must dare to be brave and have courage to express myself and to dare to be silly, in such moments. I realize that it is my responsibility to create the best solution in any given moment.

 

I commit myself to live vivacious and “spirited” – clownish, more often, by slowing down, breathing, being self honest, and just do it !

 

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

 

 

Day 786 – Feeling loss of mind (component) – going into fear

Feeling loss of mind (component) – going into fear

Just now I was listening to a eqafe interview  that very delicately describes the process that I now walk. Feeling empty and feeling loss: Just today and the last hours, I have been feeling like I Iost something within my mind and within such going into fear thinking I had lost something vital or important when it was “only” from within my mind.

 

 

I would feel angry as a direct link to a fear of loss, fear of loss of possessions, objective, things, money anything from seeing and witnessing a loss of  mind system or components and within that specific loss, feeling empty, silent, depressed, feeling loss, fear and anger lol.. quite a lot to clean up after a simple loss of a mind system component.

Quite specifically I lost a sort of blame component (to my awareness) a sort of deliberating or consequence, call it blame system component. It would simply not be “there” in my mind’s programming no more.

 

self forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into automated anger and irritation with self from losing something within my mind that I, within my mind automation,  would consider important to me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel fear of loss from losing this detail within mind and its mechanics, that I would lose and for my mind going into fear of loss, and me feeling helpless, alone, scared within the change of a second, not seeing that it was only a part of minds programming that I would let go of, where mind feels naked or in fear, and I as a being go into fear, automated with my schizophrenia into anger and further fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not feel like diving into this mechanics and details, where I think it is only mind and it is only bad news, not seeing the whole picture of what went down.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not until now see and realize some of the picture of how I can open up to myself and communicate, share and LEARN to me about such happenings and event in the life of me, here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hesitate to not ask myself questions and talk to me about what is going on in my mind – in self honesty what is going on and  trust myself to know self and communicate to self.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek to know what the future holds, when that is literally impossible, I am here, as breathe, I have to work here with the tools that I have.

 

When and as I see myself feeling a sudden, unexpected drop, or fall, scare, fear or anger, seemingly out of nowhere. I stop I take a deep breath and I slow myself down. I realize that it is in such happenings and moment I can learn, evolve and grow to understand the situation, to understand my mind. I realize that such situations holds great potential for me to open up, and communicate to self and learn about me here.

I commit myself to in such moments, to open up, write, or talk in a considerate way to others about what is going on within. To open up first and for most for me to learn how to live my life.

 

I commit myself to communicate more to me – about me. I commit myself to make each moment matter – more.

 

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These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

 

 

Day 785 – The Quantum Mechanics of Paranormal Events

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Get this product here:

https://eqafe.com/p/the-quantum-mechanics-of-paranormal-events-part-1

 

Introducing paranormal series. The existence of quantum physical. Quantum physical is where: consciousness as energy and physicality as manifested solidity – meets and merges.

 

A relationship between physical solidity and quantum energy – create voices, the materialization of ghosts as well as physical reality.

This interview of the paranormal comes to question what our standing and existence as physicality within our awareness.

What is our living existence based on ? What is it we are NOT seeing ?

 

How is also imaginations also like ghosts ? Or thoughts ? Are they not paranormal ?

Be ready with this interview to dive into the matrix of self. To really see into what reality or normality that might exist. How there could be ghosts, poltergeist, demons or similar, to occupy a physical reality.

How do we exits in both quantum energy and also physicality ?

Going into this series you will get listen to debating some veeeery fine existential questions – and you will defiantly have some eye openers to what reality or existence really is about !

 

Enjoy !

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

Day 784 – Holding Back and Imprisoning My Life – Life Review

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Living the words “What are you waiting for ?” I think we all can see our self face to face with our limitations somehow, and that most of us have lived this sentence, within our experience. Like sentencing our self. “I sentence you/self to so & so..”

https://eqafe.com/p/holding-back-and-imprisoning-my-life-life-review

So within this interview from some ones living and experience, this is then explained how these words, this sentencing of self is making our life – less. Often we find that it is some specific thing from our past that we cannot take responsibility for. It is some event or story from our past, that we will not become one with, where we really would benefit, grow and expand if we really dare to look behind this sentencing. And how it is fear and fear of losing control that will make us abdicate and further separate from these events from our past. Emotional things, that has command on us, in a deadlock. So we end up simply recycling or mind systems and our past emotions and live those systems over and over again.

Listen to this person unwrap the life process that was walked with challenges starting to accumulate at art school and how life is limited from a experience at school.

It is about taking that little leap of self communication, being open and honest with self. Learning to know self, and work ones way through the limitations.

 

Looking at the words “what are you waiting for ?”, or “what is holding you back?” can be used, written out with pen and paper, to really investigate self and see within self, into me I see…. forgive the energy components within and realize self from those points that had self in prison by self.

You would be amazed of your potential if you could start with listening to this interview, and then go asking self, some real deep and existential questions, like what is holding me back from living me ? We all know and have dreams of utopia, and our outmost potential. Individually we are the key.  The change starts with a really deep look into our self. Into me I see. Don’t forget self forgiveness.

 

So really:  what is holding you back ?

I recommend pen and paper.

 

Enjoy !

 

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

Day 783 – serious

Living serious

 

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Who am I as the word serious ? The word serious can be quite interesting.

Let’s look at this word in my native tongue – Norwegian, let’s play and investigate this word.

Ser I oss ?

Ser dere oss ?

Can tho see us ?

Can you see me ?

Ser I ous –  can you see me/us ?

It ends up like a question, if I am visible or not. If anyone can see me. So what should make one stick out in a crowd ? What draws our attention on what premises ?

Let’s dive into this… We humans are a result of cultural and multilayered programming and upbringing. Consisting of memories, words,  data, energies, conscious, sub-conscious and unconscious mind that have made a myriad of impacts on us as beings. I mean we have gone thought some nasty shit to end up like we have, with constant war, crimes, inequality, pollution, abuse of life, rape, murder, ignorance and that list goes on & on. The human creation. Not a lot to be proud of – so far !

 

Most of us live under cultural influence and a undisputable demand to consume and  live according to polarized and painful energy surges and experiences  – constantly chasing the newest gadget, theme, movie, tech, money, porn, clothing, mobile, drug, hype etc.

 

We are driven by our minds (!) desire to do “this” over “that”.  Within a fraction of a  second we make our minds to chose, Paris Hilton over Naomi Klein, or Simone de Beauvoir,  we chose a coca cola, over a carrot or water, or porn instead of self investigation,  we choose violent computer games over writing our life story and reading books about perma culture. Can you agree to this  ?? We drive and chase porn, video games, and celebrities, energies, we do anything, all the time to have more money, and to improve our status above others in compare. This is still the core human drive of mentality.  This have been going on for some time now.

 

So why should I be serious, why should people look at one ? What makes one so special ?

To be special today, in a smart way, to be serious,  is to chose to be responsible to have awareness, and self honesty with ones living. To see and work with how minds has us in a dead lock position.  To address the programming within self, of energies and imagination within, being it emotions, believes, thoughts, addictions, personalities, behaviors, ingrained patterns, judgment, fears or desires. To see it all and I expose it, document it, chose to delete it with self forgiveness. To know how it came about, to prevent it to come again.

Here is a catch, If I don’t know what is driving me into fear then how can I stop fear ? If I don’t know the details and specifics of fear, how it origins and operates, then how to delete it ? And we know that fear feeds anger and so the spiral of abuse goes. And we see the conflict in the world as a direct result.

I am serious because I in full debt and consideration take measure of my mind, and chose to work through it, with the very best tool of self forgiveness.

 

I use myself and my life and living as example. I puzzle all that I have been, all my parts I dissolve and place back together after deleting the energy (addiction) involved. I am ser – I – us because I make myself un-corrupt in relation to energies/money. I delete all the element that have led me to the reactions, voices in the head, addictions, fears, judgments, ignorance, believes and so on. I take life serious. Still though;  I don’t want to separate myself into a “good person”,  a “Jesus character”, personality construct, no. I just want to share my earnest, sincere, and honest consideration of how I live my life and the experiences such.

Either to blame any type of programing – because that is all it is. Programs. If I blame something or someone that is a signal that I have something to take responsibility for in my living.

 

So again it is to “know thy self”  – meaning to know the physical, to know self from the flesh. To have a certain awareness of oneness energy relationship. To know how mind works, and gradually take charge of oneness mind and then ones living. To change. To be serious. It does not mean to be boring and dull and grey… no then we have missed the point. And besides that is a assumption and a judgment of others or self. To be serious it to learn self as all the self is, and to become responsible with ones process and living. To know the minds yoga and to learn how systems of mind works. To dissolve the mind systems before it manifests. To take a stand for change. Real honest and genuine. And fail me not: being serious, can be done in a clownish way. That is serious. I chose to be serious, I chose to stand up !

 

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/

 

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Day 782 – expanding in the life process

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Looking at my current living, where I am, and my livelihood, and how I more or less creative and in consideration define myself to be, I would like to just elaborate on my current process and status. For many years I have defined myself as and within the stigmatizing ground of psychiatry, addictions, and mental illness. I have come to realize that we all, every single fart included of humankind are more or less mentally suffering, being of mind. Stating that I do not close myself into being only psychiatry or that ballpark anyway. How do I define myself today and within walking my process of total change into something more something better and supportive, something of real matter ? It is right there in front of me, like this impression of nature and of detail, and stability, because what am I doing ? I am expanding, including, uniting and cooperating. I discover, reveal and I heal. I learn and I grow. More than anything else. I discover myself, I close down my believes, my fears and my reactions and addictions, by uniting with its origin and life, structure of me is becoming one with the self, and with all that is me.

 

Within here is stored mega bytes of self forgiveness and persistent walking of my process, embracing self as life and uniting, and even creating more of me, what is discovering of my own expression – my living. I find myself more and more in equilibrium with not only nature as I see it, but me, self as life force, and will to live. I more than ever before,  would like to live till I am over 100 years old lol. There is so much I would like to participate with and further create.

 

Today more than ever before, I realize my standing and creative ability and life force. My will to go on with projects, chores, responsibility, daring to be a bit of a “clown” perhaps and taking on new challenges in common sense and self awareness. Many have said this before me that it is the nucleus cell and being of ordinary people, that will eventually change this world – because we change: ourselves, our ingrained patterns and behaviors,  first and become one and equal – physical, responsible as being and life force in where we are.

So for me at the moment it is about nurturing myself within slowing down and taking one breathe at the time, to really get this point of expanding and not falling into old destructive patterns of mind.

Today I notice such a simple thing as not daring to ask for a hug, and to embrace self completely, as another, would sort of bring me down, and I know that I could “take on a clown suit” and simply ask bluntly for a hug – and I would be granted so.

Time to embrace the clown from within huh ? To nurture and grow as a playful clown – myself. To rediscover play (and fun) in my daily life.

So in a way it is also about daring and taking that initiative. Being brave sort of. So that I can continue to walk and make progress and learn as I go. Grounding is perhaps a word I am seeking for.

Either way I am proud of who I am today, I have a level of integrity and self respect. I am someone new at the same time reborn as self in the physical. I live to suit the support of life and to expand myself on all areas of progressing and sustainable creation.

Realizing just now, sitting here typing in front of my screen, that, I have had a long history of being for instance dyslectic. I have still difficulties with writing  by hand – and reading it later. School was not my thing lol. But I will not blame the system – because the system is me. I created it. Together with for instance you. So it is a process of uniting, embracing and forgiving, bringing back to self all parts that I has separated myself from and made into mind fucks and loops, recycling the mind junk. Today I embrace it and bring it back to me- to oneness and equality.

 

Thanks for reading !

 

These links are super – potent with the finest of support

– I am living proof

http://desteni.org/

http://desteniiprocess.com/

http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/

https://eqafe.com/

https://warnomore.wordpress.com/

https://theendofpsychiatry.wordpress.com/