Day 543 – Anger/aggression from mumbling, when I read blogs.


I realize this troubling pattern within me. It is a pattern about reading blogs and reading in particular blogs from 7 year journey to life blogs, that I follow. I would read through them way to fast, and in a hurry, and I would mumble through the text, in a hurry, to get to the point, the light in the tunnel so to speak. Addicting myself to the hope in the words. Form my imagination. From pre – program. But I see that I would further need to nurture from the words of the text and not be distracted by the hope – drug, from my own imagination.

And then later I become angry with myself and I would blaming myself & others, for my feeling of  “left out”  sitting “left behind” not remembering –  the blog but simply hanging on to the tunnel vision of hope and possibility of change, like a idea of hope/tunnel vision/drug. Fake.

So I will work through this pattern with self forgiveness and self corrections, in blogs to come. So that I may in the future read blogs and all sorts of text, in a normal and considerate manner, without rushing and judging and needing and craving the tunnel vision – drug – to see hope.

For further perspective on hope I would recommend this awesome blog by Victor Person:

Self forgiveness and self corrections to be lived – in blogs to come.

Have a nice day!


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