Day 485 – My dog Castro self forgiveness

Self forgiveness on pet dog Castro

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for thinking that I did wrong by taking this dog Castro to myself when I was not prepared for the challenges that goes with it, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for my memory of positive energy for singing to my dog Castro when he was to sleep and on to holding this memory with a positive attachment when I was to remembering the dog.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for thinking I was lucky for having this other family taking care of my dog since I was unable to care for him.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself my memory of negative energy where I got angry and at my dog because he would not understand what I said to him when I told him not to walk on the high way but rather walk on the side walk, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself that I would carry this grudge within me all these years from this one and single memory of walking on a road with him and ending up angry because he would not do what I told him.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for having the backchats in my head saying “you cannot care for a dog” and “you are not managing to care for even a dog, how stupid are you then”, “you must be retarded because you cannot care for a dog”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself for living such a way that I could not be responsible with myself – and for the substance abuse that was ruing my ability to care for a/the dog/Castro.

When and as I see myself going back to my memories of having this dog Castro and the story that happened to it, I stop and I breathe. I realize that Castro is somewhere else now and there are not great change that I will see him again, I commit myself to not cry over the time we where separating and I commit myself to let this belong in my past and to remember him as my friend that I had in the past. I commit myself to investigate if I am going to have a pet again to consider all these experiences that I have gained now, and I commit myself to figure out and investigate my past to question more and learn from my past and to be responsible with everything that I do.

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